Texas Governor Bans Rainbow Crosswalks, Apparently Colors Are Too Scary

Austin, TX — In what critics are calling a colorful overreaction, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has ordered the removal of rainbow crosswalks across the state, claiming that public art on roads represents “political ideologies” rather than simple displays of inclusion.

The directive, issued to the Texas Department of Transportation (TxDOT), targets any decorative pavement markings that are not strictly related to traffic control or safety. Abbott’s office says the move is intended to prevent taxpayer dollars from being used to advance political agendas — a categorization that now apparently includes pastel stripes.

“Texans should not be forced to see political messages when they walk or drive through our streets,” an Abbott spokesperson said. Meanwhile, many Texans are left asking whether pink, teal, or even smiley faces might also be considered suspicious under the new rules.

The rainbow crosswalks, long a symbol of support for the LGBTQ+ community, have been installed in cities nationwide as a gesture of inclusion and recognition. Critics argue that Abbott’s order represents an unnecessary crackdown on diversity and expression in public spaces.

Cities that fail to comply with the removal directive could face cuts to state and federal road funding, raising concerns among local leaders. “It’s hard to believe that paint on pavement is now considered a threat,” said one city official, speaking anonymously.

Abbott’s decision follows similar measures in Republican-led states removing Pride-themed displays, a trend that advocates say sends a troubling message about public visibility for LGBTQ+ residents.

For now, Texas streets will revert to a world of black, white, and boring-but-safe, leaving rainbows and inclusivity in the metaphorical crosswalk.